I feel it is time for me to remind you of a few little details that will make our experience hurtling through the air at 750 miles per hour/35,000 feet somewhat more enjoyable.
First, a belly shirt and cutoff jeans shorts over black spandex pants with UGG boots is not an appropriate outfit for air travel. Moreover, this is not an appropriate outfit ever.
Second -- and here I have to make a shout out to the Gentleman in 23H, sitting behind me on American flight 185 from JFK to LAX today, you know who you are -- anyway, I know that sometimes you need to move your tray table or put things in the seat back pocket. But is it really necessary to rudely jostle my entire seat every five minutes? For reals, dude, Ima slip you a Xanax or six in about five minutes.
Third, to the flight attendants, a head's up before you run my foot over with the drink cart would be much appreciated. Or at least could I get a "sorry I ran over your foot" once you've already broken my toe??
Finally, I'm all about carry on food. Saves money and all that. Plus man cannot live on peanuts alone. But let's consider a prohibition on smelly food. This includes, but is not limited to, bananas, kimchee, tunafish sandwiches, and anything hard-boiled egg-related.
Yeah, so if you could just follow these couple of little guidelines, that would be great.
XO,
M
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